Road Trips

Our young friend Kyle has written a little something up about our trip down south, a first for him.  I present it to you unedited and unabridged.  Let him know what you think..

-Ryan

"Road Trips"
by Kyle Owens

There comes a time when every climber entertains the idea of leaving the home crag and venturing out in search of new rock. This doesn’t mean hitting up bird’s eye view on Bing and scouring every forest within an hour radius for any potential of a new and possibly non-scoured chossy boulder or hitting up mountain project soaking up beta on new developments and asking for a tour. In the language of “dirt-bag” a climbing trip means packing your sedan to the brim with gear, wooks, and then strapping pads to the roof; knowing that you’re now that guy that no one wants to drive behind because that pad looks like it’s going to fly off your roof into traffic. Anyways, the first step to assembling a climbing trip is to pick the kind of rock and the style of climbing you’re into; once this is done, you will have a destination or perhaps even a tick list of regional crags to hit up on the way. Once, you’ve got a place in mind, it’s time to choose the crew. This crew should be your buddies that you’re always crushing both rock and schwish with. Trust me on this one the crew is crucial, I’ve heard of backpacking trips when the crew isn’t that great and more often than not, a misadventure will be the end result of a division in the crew. Packing isn’t necessarily a crucial aspect of climbing trips. To take a trip in true dirt-bag manner means to only pack shit you’ll use. The following necessities are listed in order of necessity for a great climbing trip: shoes, pads, schwish, chalk, a tent (for each guy don’t try to cram into one, nobody will think you’re straight), sleeping bags, food, two pairs of boxers, and one pair of clothes. The last part of a climbing trip that I’m going to cover is the ride. Make sure that the car has loose change for tolls, I know somebody that throws a handful of change on the floor whenever they get a new car so they don’t get screwed at a toll booth; pretty smart. Never stop in North Jersey to eat either, especially if there’s over three hours left until the destination. Keep your eyes open for ‘squatch educate yourself on their habits and calls so that you can properly identify one if you see it, plus those fuckers are known to get hit by cars. Often you’ll find yourself looking into the woods off the highway as scouring can any visible rock can be a habit. Just remember that the roc you see in those woods off of “Route Whatever” is rock that is hours and hours away from home and there’s better rock ahead of you, so just enjoy its presence though leave that developing to the locals. The best way to take a trip is by passing out somewhere around Jersey, only wake up for gas stops, and let the others drive. If you’re not going to sleep, stay up and bullshit with whoever’s driving and definitely make sure that the driver is not lost so that when you realize you’re lost the car isn’t halfway home like in Dumb and Dumber. Enjoy the trip, enjoy the new rock, mingle with the locals, maybe meet some bees, whatever, a climbing trip is as good as you make it.